Complain

When will my breakfast be made
And who will cook it,
Don’t Forget Lunch is in two hours time
With a bottle of Wine to go with it,
If it doesn’t add up the Bill
Then lets check out for a Cheaper Hotel nearby.

How will my brief reach my Desk,
Or my Report reach my Boss
For there is a meeting by noon
But my Secretary will be there soon
Oh, no I have a Meeting scheduled abroad
And my Visa expired yesterday.

Oga Driver, how I go reach this junction,
With this small money wey dey my hand
I get 1,000 naira but no change
And the place I wan go no get address
But you fit help me buy pure Water,
For I go settle Conductor before I go drop!

Sorry sir, I will not try it again,
To jump the queue is not my thing,
I have a Cousin arriving from the States
And my wife is in the Labor Room with twins,
How about I settle you with some few change
And use the rest to buy some fuel.

Taah, Tuueeh, Oh what is this?
This sour food you served is more than two days old
After paying you my month old salary in this fancy Restaurant,
A Shocking result is what I get.
Oh, who led me to come here,
When my wife can serve me through her busy schedules.

Your Money is 250,000 Naira with 30% payment,
Ahm Ehn,  Ahm Ehn sounds as he clears his throat
If you don’t mind can you receive 50,000 for a start
I left the rest before I came out
And my bank is slow to be processed online
For this House I bargained for is beyond what I expected!

 

See me see wahala, How e take become my problem
You force me, I say no and you come enter like that
Now that e don set, agbada don turn trouser
You go pay me till you tell me thank you
You use speed enter this sharp bend,
Now you don bash my car, your body don humble.

 

See Pastor I am in a dilemma
I promised my wife to be of her bride price
When my boss denied my salary twice
Yet today I said I give you my tithe
Please can I delay till the right time.

 

All these may be true or false
Whichever you stand is left for you
But to be clear of what is new
These are complaints made by me and you!